Originally published at road2wholeness.com on 6/2/16
Today the subject is the changing of seasons in our lives.
Most of us will agree that life naturally find ways to connect us to what is next in our lives. Well, in the same way it seems life will naturally disconnect us from people, places, things, etc. that have become out of season in our lives. When the season in our life changes we can quickly get in the flow or we can choose to struggle with what has suddenly become concrete. The idea of recognizing the end of one season and the beginning of another is easier to see and even accept in nature. However, in our personal lives the changing of a season is often only acceptable to us when we feel that we have somehow willed it into being. Without desire, awareness, and readiness; we are almost always resistant to the changing of seasons in our lives. Yet life doesn't seem to ask our permission in the matter. Ultimately, we are then left with the choice to get in the flow or live in resistance to the flow. That choice remains ours.
Naturally there are different types of seasons. Some seasons are relative to frames of time, some are relative to climate and demands a change of posture, and others are relative to windows of opportunities. Therefore, staying and keeping our lives in the flow of what is greater than us and is attempting to navigate us is surely a matter of sensitivity. If we believe that we were created for a purpose, then we can also believe that the Creator of that purpose (being all knowing of that purpose) is behind the flow and is attempting to guide us. Therefore, how sensitive are you to the guidance of the Creator in your life? How willing are you to relinquish what you think you know and really open yourself up to His handiwork in your life?
I've found that relationships often present the greatest hurdle in terms of staying in the flow and accepting the changing of seasons. Most of us dream of making our favorite relationships of the season into lifetime relationships and surely some will be. However, it simply isn't the case for most. The cool part however about relationships that come to an end while you are staying in flow is that both parties usually get the notice at the same time and there is a grace that comes to bring such relationships to a peaceful and loving finale. This is why I believe we sometimes here of couples that get divorced but remain great friends. This is because they acted within the flow and under the grace of a changing season. In this way, endings that are a part of Divine order are always positioned to come to a close in an orderly way. It’s like winter making way for spring; it's cooperative; it's graceful; it's inevitable. However, preconceived notions about what the lifespan of certain relationships should be sometimes make it difficult for this to happen. Egos come into play; insecurities flare; fears run wild.
Here are a few examples of the difficulties that ego, insecurity, and fear creates.
Ego coming into play may sound like… “How dare you walk away from this friendship after all that I’ve done for you!” And that may be very true but don't tie yourself to your investments; let them go and grow and flourish. Furthermore, I've learned that relationships founded on brokenness won’t hold up when one party becomes whole. A person seeking value through over-giving or by taking on the savior role in a relationship may find it hard to step into another role when that needy person is no longer demonstrating neediness. Ego keeps the over-giver locked into a fixed role and doesn't allow them to find a new fit in the relationship. In such cases the relationship will surely come to an end and both parties will know but the ego will surely try to stand in the way.
Insecurities might sound like… “Who will I be without this relationship?” It is certainly true that at the end of some relationships we are asked to give up a layer of seeming security or even pretense. Yet, on the other side we often find a new version of self that we’ve been dying to be or praying to see.
Fear may sound like… “Another failed relationship. What are people going to think?” These types of reactions are very common. Many people stay stuck in situations and relationships because they aren’t willing to look like a failure. This is dangerous territory because some would even devalue themselves just to hold on and keep the face of the relationship. But it’s really important that we develop the ability to look failure in the face and say, “Yeah, I fell. But I’m getting up!” or "Yes, I have failed. But where there is life certainly there is chance! I will rise again!"
You see, I believe that as we remain sensitive to the ongoing changing of seasons in our lives and the delicate nature of the different types of seasons that approach us, that we will bring our lives into full alignment with our purpose. The desire to be guided by The One with the plan will surely allow us to make the sometimes difficult decision to step into new seasons, dimensions, and purposes for our lives. Today, I simply want to encourage you to continue making a commitment to get in the flow and to honor the things that are now "Out of Season!" in your life.
Be Absolutely Blessed! And remember, "Go within that you may never go without." The God within you awaits you! Until our paths collide again, I wish you.... Peace, Love, Life, and Harmony.
In Service,
NaTisha Renee Williams
the "Emotional Life" Coach
Today the subject is the changing of seasons in our lives.
Most of us will agree that life naturally find ways to connect us to what is next in our lives. Well, in the same way it seems life will naturally disconnect us from people, places, things, etc. that have become out of season in our lives. When the season in our life changes we can quickly get in the flow or we can choose to struggle with what has suddenly become concrete. The idea of recognizing the end of one season and the beginning of another is easier to see and even accept in nature. However, in our personal lives the changing of a season is often only acceptable to us when we feel that we have somehow willed it into being. Without desire, awareness, and readiness; we are almost always resistant to the changing of seasons in our lives. Yet life doesn't seem to ask our permission in the matter. Ultimately, we are then left with the choice to get in the flow or live in resistance to the flow. That choice remains ours.
Naturally there are different types of seasons. Some seasons are relative to frames of time, some are relative to climate and demands a change of posture, and others are relative to windows of opportunities. Therefore, staying and keeping our lives in the flow of what is greater than us and is attempting to navigate us is surely a matter of sensitivity. If we believe that we were created for a purpose, then we can also believe that the Creator of that purpose (being all knowing of that purpose) is behind the flow and is attempting to guide us. Therefore, how sensitive are you to the guidance of the Creator in your life? How willing are you to relinquish what you think you know and really open yourself up to His handiwork in your life?
I've found that relationships often present the greatest hurdle in terms of staying in the flow and accepting the changing of seasons. Most of us dream of making our favorite relationships of the season into lifetime relationships and surely some will be. However, it simply isn't the case for most. The cool part however about relationships that come to an end while you are staying in flow is that both parties usually get the notice at the same time and there is a grace that comes to bring such relationships to a peaceful and loving finale. This is why I believe we sometimes here of couples that get divorced but remain great friends. This is because they acted within the flow and under the grace of a changing season. In this way, endings that are a part of Divine order are always positioned to come to a close in an orderly way. It’s like winter making way for spring; it's cooperative; it's graceful; it's inevitable. However, preconceived notions about what the lifespan of certain relationships should be sometimes make it difficult for this to happen. Egos come into play; insecurities flare; fears run wild.
Here are a few examples of the difficulties that ego, insecurity, and fear creates.
Ego coming into play may sound like… “How dare you walk away from this friendship after all that I’ve done for you!” And that may be very true but don't tie yourself to your investments; let them go and grow and flourish. Furthermore, I've learned that relationships founded on brokenness won’t hold up when one party becomes whole. A person seeking value through over-giving or by taking on the savior role in a relationship may find it hard to step into another role when that needy person is no longer demonstrating neediness. Ego keeps the over-giver locked into a fixed role and doesn't allow them to find a new fit in the relationship. In such cases the relationship will surely come to an end and both parties will know but the ego will surely try to stand in the way.
Insecurities might sound like… “Who will I be without this relationship?” It is certainly true that at the end of some relationships we are asked to give up a layer of seeming security or even pretense. Yet, on the other side we often find a new version of self that we’ve been dying to be or praying to see.
Fear may sound like… “Another failed relationship. What are people going to think?” These types of reactions are very common. Many people stay stuck in situations and relationships because they aren’t willing to look like a failure. This is dangerous territory because some would even devalue themselves just to hold on and keep the face of the relationship. But it’s really important that we develop the ability to look failure in the face and say, “Yeah, I fell. But I’m getting up!” or "Yes, I have failed. But where there is life certainly there is chance! I will rise again!"
You see, I believe that as we remain sensitive to the ongoing changing of seasons in our lives and the delicate nature of the different types of seasons that approach us, that we will bring our lives into full alignment with our purpose. The desire to be guided by The One with the plan will surely allow us to make the sometimes difficult decision to step into new seasons, dimensions, and purposes for our lives. Today, I simply want to encourage you to continue making a commitment to get in the flow and to honor the things that are now "Out of Season!" in your life.
Be Absolutely Blessed! And remember, "Go within that you may never go without." The God within you awaits you! Until our paths collide again, I wish you.... Peace, Love, Life, and Harmony.
In Service,
NaTisha Renee Williams
the "Emotional Life" Coach
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