Don't Swallow the Pain

It recently became knowledge to me that since the age of maybe seven or eight, I've been swallowing my pain.  Over the course of my young life there have been some very traumatic moments where instead of speaking of, confronting, or sharing my pain.... I took a big Gulp and simply swallowed the pain.  I swallowed it and allowed it to fester.  I swallowed it and allowed it to grow hands and feet.  I swallowed it and allowed it to crystallize and harden within me.  I swallowed it and told myself I didn't deserve to feel what I was feeling.  I swallowed it and figured it would dissipate or evaporate even.... but No!  Wrong!  I peel back the layers of callus surrounding my heart... and there they are... laughing and smiling; playing hopscotch; having a blast; not thinking about me... just happy to be alive; happy they never got dealt with; never got put to rest.

Seeing this, I was quickly able to match the pain to its manifestation.  I could identify each trauma and see how it being kept alive had allowed for other things to come about in my life.  I saw how not feeling loved as a young girl... made me a promiscuous teen and a young woman with low standards.  I also saw how even though I had conquered promiscuity and raised my standards... my pain still being alive; made me a very isolated soul.. kept me from fully emerging myself in life. It was all there... all the pain; three decades of pain dancing around in total bliss.... personifying and reapplying itself in my life as depression, overweight, anxiety, loneliness, rejection, pessimism, fear... you just name it!

So I'm sharing this with you because somewhere along the line we were taught to swallow our pain; to eat it up before anyone could see it; to bury it alive.  Somewhere along the line we were told to be strong, to get back to business as usual in our lives... But I'm saying No!  I'm saying No More!  No more pain frolicking around in my mind keeping me up all night, keeping me uptight and unapproachable... No More!  No more pain telling me I'm invisible therefore I should be fat; then maybe they'll see me! (oh you think that's crass... oh no... that's the creativity of the subconscious mind)... but No More!  No More! No More Big Gulps! No More Swallowing the Pains in Our Lives!

Starting right now... I invite you to look within and see what pains are showing up and showing out in your life.  See what lies your pain has cooked up in your life.  But don't just see it.... Destroy it! Evict it! Uproot it! Dismantle it! Purge it once and for all... Be New Again!  Be You Again! Be Well. Live Well.


Peace be with you,


NaTisha Renee
your Emotional Life Coach



P.S.

Understand that fat around the heart is not all that causes heart failure. The calluses of Pain my friends will also cause the heart to tire.